Here is how to overcome insecurity in a relationship. Yes, it is possible!

Here is how to overcome insecurity in a relationship. Yes, it is possible!

Is your insecurity killing your relationship? Everyone has a moment of insecurity every now and then. It’s perfectly normal to have an issue every now and then. I mean, who doesn’t?

But when it comes to relationships, those insecurities can kill your relationship. Insecurity is an inner feeling of being threatened and/or inadequate in some way.


There is no one cause of insecurity; many factors can lead to the condition. Insecurity may stem from a traumatic event, a crisis such as a divorce or a loss.  So many things can cause you to be insecure. But you need to fix that. Insecurity can be toxic. You need to be honest about your feelings and master your mindset.

You have to depend on yourself to improve your security. Your boyfriend (or husband) can never do enough to make you feel secure. That’s on you. No matter how faithful and attentive he is, you’re certain that he’ll hurt you. You ask him leading questions and try to trick him into admitting he likes other women. You’re only killing yourself and the relationship by being so ridiculous.

If you want to improve your relationship then you need to work on yourself and learn to be more secure in you.

Time and again, studies have shown that one of the sexiest things in a woman is their confidence.  Believe it or not, it’s true. Some men will even go as far as to say that confidence can make an average woman, over the top.

So what can you do to build confidence in yourself? Well, that’s never easy but some say that you should try daily affirmations. This means when you wake up each morning and put on your makeup, spend that time looking in the mirror repeating positive things like “I am beautiful. I am smart. I am wonderful. I am strong.”

You should repeat these things ten times a day, every single day.

The more you do it, the easier it becomes and even more importantly, the more you start to actually believe it.

  • Stay strong.
  • Stay positive.

And remind yourself each and every day just how fabulous you really are. If you do, you just might notice a major improvement in your relationship.

Beyond boosting your own self-confidence you also need to remember not everything is about you.  No seriously. Stop over-analyzing every word your partner makes. Obsessing over the hidden meanings is things he may do or say will only drive you insane. If you find yourself starting to obsess about it, you need to take a mental time out and focus your time on making a list of things you love about yourself or your partner. Yes, I mean actually make a list, even if only in your head. Making a mental note of all the reasons you love yourself will help boost your self-confidence. It’s important to focus on your positive attributes. It will put you in a good headspace and if you’re busy doing that, you won’t be busy obsessing about the inner secret meaning of what your boyfriend means when he says he doesn’t feel like going on a vacation right now or that he wants to get a new car. Maybe he just really wants a new car. It doesn’t mean he’s cheating on you. Come on …. not everything is about you!

My last bit of advice is to talk to a professional. You don’t even have to leave your house to do it. Check out sites like Teledoc. Make a list of things about yourself that you don’t like and talk to a counselor about it and let the doc work through each of them with you. You’d be surprised how much better you feel after doing this. Doing this can make such a huge difference in your life.

author avatar
Tracy Tegan
Tracy Tegan has spent the last seventeen years as a professional blogger about relationships, dating, and issues pertaining to gender equality at In her spare time, she writes romance novels that are available at Amazon.  You can check out Tracy Tegan's latest romance novel, Crescent Moon at Amazon.

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Here is how to overcome insecurity in a relationship. Yes, it is possible!

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