I’ve been with my boyfriend for about a year and a half now. Last year we were still too new to worry about spending the holidays with his family or mine, we each just went to our own family’s house for Thanksgiving. But now we’ve gotten far more serious and I’m not sure how to handle Thanksgiving. Do we go to his families house or mine?
For Christmas, we have it made. His family is big on Christmas Eve and mine is all about Christmas day. But Thanksgiving is an issue. Even though both of our families live in the same city, they both have dinner at noon so we can’t be in both places at the same time. Help!
Holidays are supposed to be a happy time that you spend with families, but far too often it’s just a big stressful mess. My first suggestion is to speak to both your family and his and see if they will both consider moving the time just a bit. Maybe one family will consider having Thanksgiving in the evening instead of at noon so you can joyfully have time with each family.
If that isn’t an option, then you are going to have to decide between skipping one family altogether or you each spending time with your respective families without each other. If you do decide that you want to be together for the holidays, then remember to be fair when selecting which family to spend Thanksgiving with and let the other family know that next year you will spend it with them.
The only way to be genuinely fair as to who gets to see you this year if you do have to pick one family over the other is to draw a name out of a hat. This way the selection process is totally random, and there won’t be any feelings of resentment from one family over the other because the “winning” family, was left entirely up to fate.
And again if one family is really THAT upset over not seeing you, they do still always have the option of changing the time of their dinner from noon to later in the day.