When I was in Junior High we had this cheer that went something like Stop, look and listen – here comes the mighty Mustangs.
Now all these years later, those words have a whole new meaning — mostly the listen part.
Men love women who will listen to them. They don’t want you so say, “I told you so” or give them feedback about what you would have done if you were in his place. If they want your advice, they will ask for. What they really want is just to have you listen.
Sitting and listening shows that you truly care.
Men need to talk out a problem sometimes so they can process it. This means you just need to LISTEN. The ability to listen to what people are saying shows them that you can be truly supportive.
In other words, show your man you love him by not saying a word. Show him you care about what he has to say but simply letting him speak.
Listening is one of the most essential communication skills you can have. How well you listen can have a significant impact on your relationship.
Listening doesn’t mean just waiting for them to finish speaking so you can have your turn. Listening actually means HEARING what they have to say.
Expects say that the way to improve your listening skills is to practice what is called “active listening.” This is where you make a conscious effort to hear not only the words that another person is saying but, more importantly, try to understand the complete message being sent.
In order to do this you must pay attention to the other person very carefully.
You cannot allow yourself to become distracted by whatever else may be going on around you, or by forming counter arguments that you’ll make when the other person stops speaking. Nor can you allow yourself to get bored, and lose focus on what the other person is saying. All of these contribute to a lack of listening and understanding.
Not only sit there quietly and let them speak, but also let them know you truly understand what they are saying. Acknowledge that you understand by a simple nod of your hand or by saying “uh-huh”. It doesn’t mean you agree with that they are saying, just that you are in fact listening to them.
- Pay Attention
- Look directly at your partner
- Put aside distracting thoughts
- Don’t mentally prepare what you want to say next
- Nod occasionally to acknowledge you are listening
- Allow them to finish before asking questions
- Don’t interrupt with counter arguments
- Don’t tell what you would have done
The lesson here is to be a good partner; you need to be a good listener.
